Walk This Way

Our current basement dweller is wrapping up his university experience. But in his final semester, he's having to fulfill a requirement for graduation he's not yet met.

Take a PE class. It’s required.

He's chosen a 'walking' class. Officially, FITNESS FOR LIFE: WALKING.

I was curious as to what that class might be like. Do you walk around campus? Do you go to the parks and walk?

We have miles of paved trails running through our town that would make for excellent exercise. Maybe that’s what they do.

So, I started asking questions.

On day one, they introduced themselves to each other. Whoa! That’s a harsh way to start a walking class.

Since then, there’s been some ferocious games of RED LIGHT, GREEN LIGHT where you can’t run, only walk.

There’s a Pac Man game they play, which is little more than a game of tag, but you must stay on the lines of the basketball court. And again, no running. This is a walking class.

I think they’re doing it wrong.

It is my personal belief that students should not be thrown into a walking class unprepared. They should first take a class called INTRODUCTION TO WALKING.

For an entire semester, the instructor talks about walking. How to walk fast, how to walk slow, how to walk and chew gum at the same time… that sort of thing.

Here’s the final exam:

What is the first thing you should do to prepare for walking?

Everyone who answers ‘stand up’ gets an A.

Class dismissed.

The kids in the basement are an endless source of entertainment. If you’re still sitting on the toilet while reading this, you might enjoy The Basement Dwellers — Tales From Tibby